January 8, 2026
Most managers aren't trained to recognize or respond to grief. Here's what effective training looks like and how to support employees through loss
Grief shows up at work whether you're ready for it or not. At any given time, one in four employees is actively grieving. That's not an edge case or an occasional HR issue. It's a constant presence in every team, department, and organization.
The problem is that most managers aren't equipped to handle it. And when they fumble the response, the consequences ripple through teams, productivity, and retention for months.
This guide breaks down why manager grief training matters, what it should cover, and how to build the kind of ongoing support that keeps employees engaged through their hardest moments.
When managers don't know how to respond to grief in the workplace, the damage extends far beyond one awkward conversation. It is important to note that grief will likely extend beyond bereavement leave and to continue support throughout the year.
According to Workplace Options, only 11% of managers can correctly identify performance issues as grief-related. Signs like irritability, withdrawal, or distraction are frequently misinterpreted as disengagement or poor motivation. The result is that grieving employees receive discipline instead of support, damaging trust and accelerating turnover.
Consider what happens when grief goes unrecognized:
These outcomes aren't hypothetical. Bereave's poll shows that 51% of employees who experience a close loss leave their job within 12 months. Much of this turnover is preventable.
Good training goes beyond reviewing bereavement policy. It builds the emotional intelligence and practical skills managers need to support their teams through loss.
Not all grief looks like sadness. Some employees become irritable. Others withdraw or seem distracted. Some throw themselves into work as a coping mechanism, only to crash weeks later.
Training should help managers recognize these patterns without making assumptions. The goal isn't to diagnose grief but to create space for honest conversation when something seems off.
The instinct to solve problems can feel strong, especially for managers used to fixing things quickly. But grief isn't a problem to solve.
In a recent Bereave webinar, Faith Holloway, a workplace bereavement expert who leads the Compassionate Employers Program at Hospice UK, emphasized that the most important thing a manager can do is slow down and listen. Validation needs to come before logistics. She noted that "it's crucial that the person feels acknowledged before any solutions or adjustments are offered."
This doesn't require special words or scripts. A simple "I'm sorry you're going through this" often matters more than jumping straight to scheduling discussions.
Silence can feel awkward in professional settings. Many managers rush to fill it, which can unintentionally pressure grieving employees to move on before they're ready.
Effective training teaches managers that silence is acceptable. It can even be named openly. Saying something like "We can sit here quietly for a moment" gives the employee permission to process without feeling rushed.
If a manager feels uncertain about what to say, acknowledging that openly can actually reduce tension. There's nothing wrong with admitting you don't have the perfect words while still showing up with genuine care.
A single conversation at the time of loss isn't enough. Research from Empathy's 2025 Grief Tax Report shows that the direct impact of grief on work performance lasts an average of 17 to 18 months. That's nearly six business quarters, not three to five days.
Managers who understand this can weave support into their regular routines rather than treating grief as a one-time event.
Make check-ins consistent, not intensive. Brief, regular touchpoints signal that an employee's situation hasn't been forgotten. A quick "How are you doing this week?" maintains connection without overwhelming. The key is consistency. Sporadic attention can feel performative. Regular presence feels genuine.
Offer specific help, not open-ended invitations. "Let me know if you need anything" puts the burden on the grieving employee to ask for help. Many won't, either because they don't want to be a burden or because they don't know what they need. Specific offers work better: "I'll take the client call this afternoon" or "Let me handle the report deadline so you don't have to think about it."
Watch for delayed struggles. Grief doesn't follow a schedule. An employee might seem fine for weeks and then hit a wall around an anniversary, a holiday, or an unexpected trigger. Managers who stay attentive over the long term can catch these moments before they escalate.
Returning to work after a loss is rarely straightforward. Employees may struggle with focus, feel overwhelmed by routine tasks, or experience grief unexpectedly throughout the day.
A structured return-to-work plan helps ease this transition. The plan should be personalized based on what each employee needs, not a one-size-fits-all template.
The goal is to make the transition as smooth as possible while remaining responsive to needs that may change week to week.
Policy sets the floor. Culture determines whether employees actually feel supported.
When managers are trained to handle grief with empathy, it sends a message to the entire team. Employees notice how their colleagues are treated during difficult moments. A manager who responds with genuine care builds trust that extends far beyond the individual situation. A manager who fumbles the response (or worse, ignores it) erodes trust across the organization.
Normalize grief as part of work. Encourage leaders to acknowledge loss openly when appropriate. Make it clear through actions, not just words, that bringing your whole self to work includes bringing your grief.
Equip managers with real skills. Communication techniques, active listening, and the ability to recognize when someone is struggling give managers the confidence to show up when it matters most.
Make resources visible. Many organizations offer employee assistance programs and grief counseling, but awareness is often low. Regularly remind your workforce about these options without making anyone feel pressured to use them.
Grief in the workplace isn't going away. Training managers to handle it well is one of the most practical investments an organization can make.
The elements are straightforward: teach managers to recognize grief, respond with empathy rather than solutions, and provide consistent support over time. When leaders show up for employees during their hardest moments, they build loyalty that lasts far beyond the grief itself.
Organizations that get this right don't just retain talent. They create the kind of culture where people want to stay, even when life doesn't go according to plan.
Why do managers need specific training on grief?
Most managers default to problem-solving mode, but grief isn't something to fix. Without training, managers often misread grief symptoms as performance issues, respond with logistics instead of empathy, or avoid the conversation entirely. Each of these responses damages trust and increases the risk of losing valuable employees.
What should manager grief training include?
Effective training covers how to recognize grief (which doesn't always look like sadness), how to lead initial conversations with empathy, how to get comfortable with silence and uncertainty, and how to provide ongoing support over months rather than days.
How long does grief actually affect work performance?
Research shows the direct impact of grief on work performance lasts an average of 17 to 18 months. Standard three to five day bereavement policies cover only a fraction of the time employees actually need support.
What if a manager says something wrong?
Saying the wrong thing is far less damaging than saying nothing at all. Employees remember whether their manager showed up, not whether they had perfect words. Acknowledging uncertainty openly ("I don't know what to say, but I'm here") is better than avoidance.
How can managers support grieving employees without overstepping?
The key is following the employee's lead. Some people want to talk about their loss. Others prefer to keep work separate. Ask directly: "How would you like me to check in with you?" and respect whatever answer you get.
See how Bereave helps teams respond with clarity, consistency, and care.
Help bring Bereave to your workplace. Your co-workers will thank you.
